Today, I was reading the Dr. Phil newsletter that I subscribe to by email. Of course, I'm a huge fan of Dr. Phil, since, as everyone knows, I like that he can tell it like it is to his 'patients' without the fear of losing the 'paycheck'. The fear which causes therapists in general to mollycoddle everyone and not just force the accountability and responsibility that so many of us "free thinking Americans" have come to decided is meant for everyone but us.
But, enough about therapists, this is not about that food chain. This is about double standards. I've been reading about this 21 year old girl named Alex, who had one baby at 15, and then married a man and had another baby, and is now divorcing the husband and the kids are living with Alex's parents because of some 'contract' the girl signed when she was only 15, stating that she would not live with a man she was not married to. Now, aside from the fact that I take issue with anyone trying to 'coerce' a 15 year old girl into signing such a document in the first place, and aside from the fact that I do not see how in Hell it could be enforceable by law, seeing as how she was only 15 and not of legal age to even enter into a contractual agreeement, I am also taking issue with the fact that anyone would think they had the right to impose and/or enforce such an agreement. I think it's a huge legal blunder to co-habitate without the protection of marriage, but it's not a crime and should never be used against anyone in a custody battle.
But, that's not the point either. My point is this: I've seen tons of people jumping all over this young woman, claiming that she is choosing a 'man' over her son and allowing her son to go live with her parents because she won't give up the boyfriend. Now, I may not agree with her decision, or her choice of boyfriend for that matter, or any number of other things that I see her doing wrong with her life, however, I see something that has irritated the living hell out of me since I was forced, against my will, into single mommyhood, and that is a consensus of people who think it fine to tell this woman that she is not being a good mother. Yet, I find no one, and no one, telling men who walk out on their children, refuse to support them, treat the mommy's like garbage, that they are bad fathers.
Sure, I've heard millions of people SAY it to a crowd of strangers, but I want to see ONE person tell a deadbeat dad, FACE TO FACE, what these people are willing to say to a mother about what it means to be a parent. So to all the 'bloggers' of the world, who want to hide behind a nameless, faceless keyboard screen, I say this
"GROW A PAIR. UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO UNITE AND MARCH UP TO ONE SINGLE SOLITARY, LONE DEADBEAT DAD AND CRITICIZE HIM AS A PARENT, DON'T CRITICIZE THE MOM'S AGAIN, AND FOR GOD'S SAKE SHUT UP!"