Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Marriage costs Tampa Bay Woman child support for 18 months

Most people think that being married gives you more legal rights than being unmarried. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Imagine being married and realizing one day, that you just are not in love. You end your marriage very amicably, without drama, and you aren't hateful, so you don't 'rush' into a divorce that will ensure 'financial devastation.' Then you meet someone else and it's love at first sight. You have a child. Two years later, that relationship ends in hate, bitterness and financial devastation. Then try to get child support from the 'biological father.' You won't. The state of Florida will attempt to hang the responsibility of support on your innocent spouse.

My name is Vanessa Blais. I live in Port Richey, Florida. For nine years I was married to a good man who never did anything to hurt anyone. Although he is a great guy, he just was not the right guy for me. The Child Support Enforcement people however, have decided that should be held responsible for the children I had with another man after the husband and I separated.

An arhcaic law on Florida's books, that dates back to the 1800's, states that if a woman is married when she gives birth to a child, the husband is the 'legal father' regardless of whether they are separated or even living in separate homes. There is absolutely no provision set in place within the Child Support Enforcement guidelines for dealing with a situation such as this.

"Child Support Enforcement refused to even acknowledge the existence of the man who is in fact the biological father of the children. They wasted over a year 'waiting' on me to get a divorce that they advised me to get without serving either of the men in question. Three separate free consultations with private attorney's advised me that the quickest course of action would be to serve both men at the same time, however, Child Support Enforcement summarily dismissed that option with a flippant 'We don't do that' response.

Since Novermber of 2007, I have been trying to get my children's biological father served with papers for paternity and child support. To add insult to injury, he is in the Florida U.S. Army National Guard Reserves. The military is supposed to be the one place that "Deadbeat Dad's" can't hide, right? Wrong.

After a year and a half of getting the 'divorce' per the 'legal advice' I was given by my local Child Support Enforcement Office in Port Richey, Florida, and getting the 'correct' wording in it too, the time has come to serve the Deadbeat Dad. According to Child Support Enforcement's Customer Service line, they contacted his "Sargeant" on May 4,2009 for an address for service.

As of May 19,2009, the "Sargeant" had not returned their phone call. However, on May 14, 2009, the Deadbeat Dad himself called Child Support Enforcement to inform them that he would be going to Iraq the next week. It seems he cannot be served while he is overseas.

On May 20, 2009, the update I got from the Florida Department of Revenue, who oversees Child Support Enforcement, states that he may not in fact be leaving for Iraq for yet another week, giving us time to serve him, and has finally produced an address too.

On May 19, I started calling the DOR when CSE informed me that they 'tried' to serve him but could not get 'confirmation' from the post office that he lives at the address provided to them and the "Sargeant" had not called back to confirm his address either. When I called DOR, I was furious. He has a driver's license, serve him at whatever address is on it. If he claims he never 'got the summons' that's too bad, just as it is with anyone else who gets a summons to appear in court.

This has finally resulted in some action, and I should get another update tomorrow. Meanwhile, I will now explore the "Miliatary Protecting Deadbeat Dads" problem that I have seen during this circus of a simple child support case.


  1. I have dealt with a military dad ohh how fun. They did nothing while I was in one state and his mistress and new baby was in another..then when he was in iraq there was nothing I could do legally.divorce nothing!..then when he finally got out of the military and worked for an american company who contracted people for Iraq making serious money..I went to modify my child support and they couldnt do anything to him because he was out of the country even though his new wife had financial power of attorney and could submit financial papers needed to modify our child support. He is back in the united states..but nothing has happned to our child support because he tells them he has no job..funny how in america you can be the only worker in the household buy a new house and own several vehicles and a boat..but cant pay more than 298 in child support...which is based on military pay 7 yrs ago 1400 month income..meanwhile he has been making 56-100k the last was 100k 2008-2009 know people who make less a yrs and whos child support is more a month what is going on??? I think it should retroact to when I filed based on his returns because all he has to do is quit his job ( become uncontracted) when child support comes up and say im there a way to stop fathers from playing the system like mine has done???

  2. Anonymous, I know of no way to stop them from doing this right now. I say we round em all up, take em outside and beat the sh*t out of them.

    But this post might give us some ideas on a 'legal' thing we can do.


  3. Sorry, that's not clickable... I'm trying something else and if it's still not clickable, just copy and paste the web address into the url bar.

    Deadbeat Dad Sentenced To A Taste Of His Own Medicine

  4. child support enforcement ... Advice to those fathers who are concerned about child support.