For 18 months I have battled Child Support Enforcement in the state of Florida to serve my children's father with child support papers. They have hemmed and hawed, and stalled, and given me innaccurate and incomplete advice and in the end, I had to be the one to solve THEIR problem before they would file.
Three months ago, when I finally did get their problem solved for them, they were now free to serve him. On May 19, after three months of waiting to hear, I called for a status update. It turns out that they called his Sargeant to get an address to serve him on May 4,2009. As of May 19, 2009, the "Sargeant" had not returned their phone calls.
Here's where it gets weird. On May 14th, 2009, the ex himself called Child Support Enforcement and told them he was leaving for Iraq in a week. This also turned out to b a lie. Did his Sargeant call him and advise him to call CSE and say he is going to Iraq to avoid returning the call and providing an address to serve him at? It certainly would appear so to me.
If the Sargeant had time to call the soldier, and advise him of the call, shouldn't that time have been spent calling Child Support Enforcement back to give an address?
Finally, On May 21, 2009, the attorney for Child Support Enforcement filed the papers and on Friday morning, the "Deadbeat Dad" got served.
Most women would be ecstatic. It would seem like the end was near. Oops. Foul ball. Ready for the kicker?
The son of a bitch leaves for Iraq on Tuesday, May 26, 2009. Not enough time to get a hearing set. Wasn't it just wonderful of his Sargeant to not call CSE back?
And here's the cherry on the cake that has been my life with this man. The "Servicemen's Civil Relief Act," formerly known as the SSCRA, protects soldiers and sailors from certain civil suits during any time of "Active Duty."
The act also says that if he has leave available, he has to use it to appear in court.
The act goes on to say that if it is a proceeding where the soldiers and sailors presence is not required, then there will be no stay granted.
Furthermore, the act states that it may not be used to escape obligations that the soldier or sailor flouted in civilian life.
1.) He is only leaving NOW... he'll have 'leave time' within the next year.
2.) His DNA is ON FILE with the military. In all reality he doesn't need to be here for the proceedings.
3.) He abandoned his children and thier mother, penniless, destitute and homeless. I would say he's been 'flouting his obligations' since the day he did that. It's time the 'flouting' STOPPED.
Of course, I have the 'wanna-be' attorney contracted by Child Support Enforcement and The Florida Department of Revenue, so this moron will probably ignore the 'loopholes' as he did with my 'marital status' problem and just 'wait' like they did for that, to resolve itself.
Deadbeat Dad has 20 days to respond to the petition. If he doesn't respond at all, there's a chance we may not even get a default becuase he's 'at war.'
If he does respond, it may be to cite the act and try to escape for yet another year.
Now my next order of business is to make certain that a 'hearing' IS set to argue against the use of the SSCRA- that is, IF he doens't just 'cowboy up' and do the right thing for once in his life.
If that doesn't work, I'll have to play my trump card and it's a big risk if I do it, but we'll see what happens.
Meanwhile, women, if you have a child with a man and you even think that there might be a possibility, no matter how remote, that he is going to go into the military, you better put his command on notice that he has children, you better establish paternity, and if you live in Florida, you better get the legal education about child support quick. The law is not on your side, and Child Support Enforcement is a joke.
This is truly a Sad case. If these children are his then he needs to stand up and be a real man. It's frustrating when having to deal with Government red tape when trying to solve a problem such as this. Local, State, and Federal governments have made a mess of the entire system.
ReplyDeleteThe government has no place in dealing with with family issues. If through DNA it is determined that this is the Father then the military should garnish his wages. But it's a double edged sword that should cut both ways.
Don't take away a persons means for earning because that doesn't help the children either. Incarceration is not a viable option unless an actual crime has been committed. There are no easy answers to this issue.
The Florida National Guard should however be obligated to investigate this matter.
talkaboutamerica
ReplyDeleteI agree that taking away his ability to support the kids isn't going to help, yet, if he's not supporting them anyway, he needs to face repercussions. We pay a lot of 'lip service' to the word 'responsibility' in the USA, yet, the most important of all our responsibilities, the responsibilities to our children, have no 'punitive' (to punish) repurcussions when it's a 'male parent' who abandons his family. Yet, if a 'female parent' left her children with a person who had no home for them and no way to support them, she would be charged with child neglect/abandonment, and it would be a CRIME. The first proble to address is the word 'civil.' If a stranger steals my car, it's a crime and he is arreste. If my 'significant other' steals my car, it's 'civil.' If I leave my child with a stranger who has no means to support him, I'm guilty of a 'crime.' But if I leave the child with a 'parent' who cannot support it, it's 'civil.' We're letting 'parents' off the hook under this 'civil law system.' It's time that parents who leave their families get PUNISHED. For one thing, the 50/50 custody agreements need to go right out the window. There should be no visitation without support. That support should also be 50% of the COST TO RAISE THE CHILDREN,... NOT a 'percentage of what is 'earned.' If Dad wants to leave his kids, he pays HALF of the expense of raising them PLUS takes off work for 50% off all dr's appts, dental appointments, middle of the night wet sheets and bad dreams. That's the TRUE 50%. Right now, we've allowed men to get 50% child support so they can say 'I raise him 50% of the time,so I shouldn't have to pay support." Not realizing that by doing this.. we're actually DOUBLING the expenses of raising these children. We now pay two rents/mortgages, two electric bills, two water bills, etc etc... which has stretched the budget to where the kids now do with less in both homes than they would have if the 'unhappy whiner' would get over it and learn to be part of the FAMILY!